Oscar Wilde’s passionate love letters revealed in honor of his 167th birthday

Oscar Wilde (L) and Lord Alfred Douglas (R). “My Own Dear Darling Boy: The Letters of Oscar Wilde to Lord Alfred Douglas.” (Photo courtesy of Warbler Press)

In celebration of Oscar Wilde’s 167th birthday on Oct. 16, Warbler Press announced the release of “My Own Dear Darling Boy: The Letters of Oscar Wilde to Lord Alfred Douglas,” a book comprised of the surviving collection of letters that Wilde wrote to his “dear darling boy” Lord Alfred Douglas, or “Bosie” as he was known. The letters are used in the new book with the permission of Merlin Holland, the executor of Wilde’s estate.

Wilde was best known for his eccentric personality and extravagant style as well as being one of the few openly gay writers of the 19th century. The British novelist was even put on trial for his homosexuality by none other than Douglas’ father. Wilde was sentenced in 1895 to two years in prison for “gross indecency” where his mental and physical health declined greatly. Wilde spent his final years living in exile where his adamant refusal to renounce his homosexuality and love for Douglas made him first a martyr and later an icon for free love.

In the new book, the lovers’ rocky relationship is further explored by looking at the surviving letters Wilde wrote to Douglas.

“I think of you always, and love you always, but chasms of moonless nights divide us. We cannot cross it without hideous and nameless peril,” Wilde wrote to Douglas in 1897, after being separated.

Editor of “My Dear Own Darling,” Ulrich Baer, decided to look further into the tumultuous relationship and compile the letters Wilde gave Douglas.

I was thinking about him [Wilde] and people still seem to put him on trial even 120 years later for his relationship with a much younger man and that he didn’t give up on that relationship,” Baer said. “So I thought, what is this relationship about? If he was so committed that he would risk not only his life, his reputation, his income, his family but then afterward even go back to it.”   

Something that surprised Baer when sorting through the letters was the only letter saved from Douglas to Wilde.

The most interesting to me was, that [UCLA Library] included one letter from Bosie back to Wilde a very moving brief letter about how much he misses him and thinks about him and there really wasn’t much of an explanation as to why. Douglas has a really complicated history and biographers are not very nice — they kind of dismiss him, they say ‘oh he was just taken advantage of on the spot,’ he was rich, he was spoiled, manipulative and he ruined Wilde’s life and so that’s what I thought,” Baer said. “This letter seems moving and genuine and real and I’d never seen it before, I was just totally fascinated to read that letter from Bosie, and to get that perspective was really surprising.”

Wilde is now revered as one of the greatest writers of the 19th-century gothic era for his work that includes “The Picture of Dorian Gray,” “The Importance of Being Earnest,” “An Ideal Husband,” “Lady Windermere’s Fan” and more, as well as being a guiding light for many LGBTQ writers and artists.

“I feel Wilde remains so fascinating for us. Major celebrity, brilliant writer, self-styled kind of fashion icon,” Baer said. “Wilde wrote with his absolute courage to be who he wanted to be. From the first efforts to say who you are, come out, present yourself to the world and then deconstruct it, redo it, make fun of it, become known for it, all of that was in Wilde.

My Own Dear Darling Boy: The Letters of Oscar Wilde to Lord Alfred Douglas” is available now wherever books are sold.

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