(Terrance Hunter’s photo is courtesy CFCArts)
We all have our insecurities, but when faced with them, we have a choice; we can allow them to create doubt, or we can allow them to create direction. Here’s a practical example, I do not believe that I am a great writer (I dislike everything I write). I can keep doubting my writing abilities, or I can allow the insecurities I have around writing to create direction, i.e., writing more, learning more about writing and being more public about my writing.
Writing isn’t the only insecurity I have. Like so many of you, I’ve questioned my identity, direction, purpose and more. At some point last year, I decided to throw all caution to the wind and just be me — in whatever form that is in the moment. I’ve never felt so free and empowered. Had I known this feeling was on the other side of “fitting in,” “following expectations” or being the “professional” I felt society required me to be, I would have done it LONG ago!
In a moment when everyone wanted to focus on what set me apart from my peers and colleagues — the very things that made my appointment as CEO remarkable and newsworthy — I could have allowed my inner thoughts to give way to insecurity and doubt but instead I allowed it to create direction. “Lean into it” I told myself. One of the ways I leaned into it, was by wearing a shirt in the Pride Parade that declared I was “young, gifted, Black, gay, and a CEO.”
What I didn’t expect was the celebration that elicited. I took pictures with strangers, got cheers from the crowd and many affirming the message with “yass!”
I don’t know that I’ve ever seen so many people — friends, strangers, colleagues, and more — so excited to lift up another person and all that they represent so freely.
Why am I sharing this now? Because at the outset of the year, many have or are wondering “what’s next” or decided to pursue something new, and with every new opportunity comes the nagging voice of doubt. Let this be the message that reassures you that insecurity has its place.
Let this be the message that encourages you to listen to it as you allow it to create direction. Because now, as we move into the new year, people leave pieces of themselves — pieces of their identity that should be celebrated — behind as they attempt to “fit in” whatever mold or societal expectation has been thrust upon us. Let this be the message that tells you to lean in and as you lean in those around you will notice and celebrate the many pieces that make you the beautiful, multilayered person you are.
What’s been most heartening about this transition is the freedom it’s given others to express their full authentic selves as well. A newfound friend has a renewed bravery and commitment to living out the fullest, most authentic version of herself daily because of how she’s seen me and those around me embrace all that I am so fully. People are always watching and crafting a narrative. I hope the one they craft about me says, “He took all of the things that worked against him and made them work for him.”
I wish the same for each of you.
Terrance Hunter is the CEO of Central Florida Community Arts. Hunter is an Orlando native who has been involved in the arts since elementary school. He received his degree in education and brings his passion for the arts and his commitment to education to CFCArts. Hunter has worked with a variety of nonprofits, from the Orange County Regional History Center to the Museum of Contemporary Art in Jacksonville to the Holocaust Memorial Resource & Education Center of Florida. He serves on multiple boards including Hope CommUnity Center, Central Florida Vocal Arts, Central Florida Chapter of Association of Fundraising Professionals, National Alliance for Music in Vulnerable Communities and the Florida Association of Museums.
