Visibili-T is dedicated to transgender members of our community in Central Florida and Tampa Bay, some you know and many you don’t. It is designed to amplify their voices and detail their experiences in life.
This issue, we check in with Tampa Bay’s Adonis “AJ” Cuevas, a self-described jack of all trades. He currently works for a local bank and several ridesharing and delivery services, ways he tries to give back to others in and outside of the LGBTQ community.
“I just like helping,” Cuevas explains. “I love helping people out in any way that I can. It fills my heart, giving back to the community and volunteering however I can.”
That includes through an LGBTQ resource group at his primary employer, the bank. Cuevas says he often participates in their volunteer initiatives, giving to those in need while working to inform others about the stigma and other issues impacting the community of which he’s a part.
“I’ve spoken about myself, about coming out as trans and just tried to help educate people,” he says. “I love doing that, because I think if we had more people speaking about the trans and LGBTQ community, it would help them understand us a little bit more.”
That’s also why Cuevas wanted to participate in Visibili-T.
“It’s very important for me,” he says. “A lot of people that I’ve spoken to don’t know what it is to be trans, or how it feels to be trans or anybody that is trans, for that matter. I think it’s really important for us to educate people about ourselves.
“We’re just like anybody else, we’re no different,” he continues. “We may identify with something that they don’t understand or comprehend, but at the end of the day, we are still people and we still have feelings. We don’t want to be treated differently.”
Cuevas is thankful that his family understood that. He says that many of his loved ones knew he was transgender long before he officially came out six years ago.
“I’ve always been passionate about my family,” Cuevas says. “I love spending time with them and it fills my heart with joy that they didn’t reject me and that I’m able to still be a part of their life.”
He acknowledges that too often, that it isn’t the case. It’s something that impacted his own journey.
“A lot of my family, they had never experienced a trans person and that’s why it was so hard for me to come out to them,” Cuevas explains. “I didn’t know how they were going to react but I’m thankful that they knew I was still the same person inside.”
That’s what he wants more people to understand.
“I wish they would take the time to get to know us before you judge us,” Cuevas says, “and that people would be more open minded to receive things that they don’t know anything about. Before transitioning, I would look in the mirror and it just did not align with what I saw in my head. It did not.
“Every time I was looking at myself before transitioning, I wouldn’t want to see what was in front of me,” he continues. “Now I’m the happiest I’ve been because I can look in the mirror and see who I saw in my head for so long. It all makes complete sense and brings me joy.”
That joy is often attacked, he notes, which he shares to illustrate some of the challenges many in the transgender community face on a regular basis. In recent years he’s been rejected from restrooms aligning with his gender identity and more.
“I still struggle with that,” Cuevas says. “I still feel uncomfortable sometimes and I don’t know if people can understand that unless you’re in our shoes.”
Other forms of discrimination include his interactions with others in public. Cuevas says it’s difficult sometimes just to be kind.
“I’ve have always been friendly, even with kids before transitioning,” he says. “I’ve noticed that after transitioning, I have to be more careful about how I act, even at the grocery store if I say, ‘oh, that’s a cute baby’ or something. It’s weird to deal with that.”
Cuevas chooses happiness anyway, living authentically just the same. He just hopes that joy translates to others.
“I want more peace in the future,” he says. “We’re living in a world that’s rough in and of itself, where something is always happening. I want to see more openness, more acceptance and more love.”
Until that happens, Cuevas will be the change he wants to see.
Interested in being featured in Visibili-T? Email Editor-in-Chief Jeremy Williams in Central Florida or Managing Editor Ryan Williams-Jent in Tampa Bay.
