PFLAG on the Page is a new column designed to offer guidance on topics affecting the LGBTQ+ community and allies.
Whether you’re looking for support, resources or answers, we promise to meet you with compassion, insight and encouragement. Submit your inquiries to PFLAG Tampa at Ask@PFLAGTampa.org.
Dear PFLAG Tampa,
I fear for my child’s future. With so much hostility toward LGBTQ+ people these days, how do we build a stronger sense of community? What can allies do to truly help?
Sincerely,
Mom of a gay kiddo in St. Pete.
Dear Mom in St. Pete,
This is an important question — one we hear often in PFLAG meetings, especially in today’s polarized climate. Building community isn’t just a luxury for LGBTQ+ people; it’s a necessity. Hostility thrives on isolation, and the best antidote to isolation is connection. Fostering connection with your community is the key to resilience, survival and joy.
I believe we are a gift to protect. The LGBTQ+ community isn’t just a group of people navigating shared challenges; we are a vibrant and invaluable part of society. We bring creativity, resilience, love and hope into a world that needs it more than ever. But these gifts are fragile if not protected.
As Brené Brown reminds us, “Every time we choose courage, we make everyone around us a little braver.” In today’s climate, choosing courage might look like showing up for a community event, speaking out against hate or simply living authentically. Each act of bravery sends a ripple effect, empowering others to find their own courage and reminding them that they are not alone, strengthening the resistance to our erasure.
Allyship is an invaluable tool in supporting our community! It is a powerful force for good, but it’s not just a label — it’s an action. Allies play a critical role in creating and sustaining inclusive, supportive communities. Here are some ways allies may make a meaningful impact.
- Listen to LGBTQ+ voices. Pay attention to what LGBTQ+ individuals share about their experiences, needs, and dreams. Allyship isn’t about “saving” others — it’s about standing with them, guided by their voices. Consider this your “guiding light.”
- Educate yourself. Allies should take the initiative to learn about LGBTQ+ history, terminology and issues. Don’t rely solely on queer friends to educate you — use your resources! Knowledge is power and being informed helps you show up more effectively.
- Show up and speak out. Advocate in public spaces. Confront homophobia and transphobia when you see it, whether at work, family gatherings or online. Silence is complicity.
- Support LGBTQ+ organizations. Volunteer, donate or amplify the work of LGBTQ+ organizations. Every bit of support makes a difference, especially as these organizations face increasing challenges.
- Be consistent. True allyship is ongoing and unconditional. Show up consistently, even when it’s inconvenient or unpopular.
For those within the LGBTQ+ community, connecting with others can feel daunting, especially in hostile times. But history shows that community has always been our greatest strength. From the Stonewall riots to mutual aid networks during the HIV/AIDS crisis, we’ve proven that unity fuels resilience.
For those within the LGBTQ+ community, connecting with others can feel daunting, especially in hostile times. But history shows that community has always been our greatest strength. From the Stonewall riots to mutual aid networks during the HIV/AIDS crisis, we’ve proven that unity fuels resilience.
Here’s how queer folks can cultivate community:
- Find your circle. Seek spaces where you feel safe and supported, whether through local LGBTQ+ organizations, online groups, or queer-friendly spaces. These are the foundations of connection.
- Support one another. Community isn’t just about what we receive; it’s about what we give. Check in on friends, attend their events and be a source of support. These acts of care strengthen our bonds.
- Celebrate your identity. Joy is an act of resistance. Attend a Pride event, share your story or host a gathering that uplifts queer culture. Because YOU are the culture!
- Engage in activism. That doesn’t have to mean attending protests (although we’re open to the option). It can involve writing to elected officials, supporting inclusive policies or educating others about LGBTQ+ issues.
- Protect your mental health. Hostility takes a toll. Prioritize your well-being so you can continue contributing to your community sustainably. PFLAG Tampa’s community support meetings are held the first Monday of every month and are a safe space for queer folks to find or lend support during challenging times.
Building community isn’t just about the present; it’s also about bridging generations. Older LGBTQ+ individuals offer wisdom from lived experience, while younger generations bring fresh energy and new ideas. Together, we create a richer, stronger community.
Consider volunteering with organizations that connect LGBTQ+ youth and elders or reach out to someone from a different generation in your own circle. Together, we are stronger.
Hostility seeks to isolate us, but community reminds us that we are not alone. Whether you’re LGBTQ+ or an ally, the work of building and sustaining community is essential. It requires intention, action and a belief in the inherent worth of every person.
At the end of the day, we build community in the small, everyday moments: the smile that says “I see you,” the hand extended in solidarity, the voice that says, “you are not alone.”
These acts of connection ripple outward, creating an unbreakable network of care and a safer world for your gay kiddo.
Let’s lead with love.
In solidarity,
PFLAG Tampa
Trevor Rosine is a Tampa native and dedicated human rights advocate who serves as president of PFLAG Tampa, chair of the city’s Human Rights Board and a nonprofit consultant at Forward Focus Development.
