Almost daily you can find a story in the newspaper, on a television newscast or online about an LGBT person or family facing discrimination of some kind. Sometimes the incident involves anti-gay slurs, major threats or, even worse, physical violence.
Those situations deserve the media attention and outrage that follows.
But sometimes we look too hard to find discrimination when there isn’t any.
Case in point: Last month a lesbian was visiting Dollywood in Pigeon Forge, Tenn., when an employee of the park asked her to turn her shirt inside out. The offensive phrase embroidered on the shirt said Marriage is so gay and prompted the request. The woman complied, entered the park and apparently had a great day with her partner and friends. She later filed a complaint with the park, saying she was offended to be asked to hide the slogan and that the park should review its policies relating to LGBT issues.
Now the park which is co-owned by Dolly Parton is being labeled as an anti-gay establishment with some LGBTs calling for a boycott, despite Parton apologizing personally and reiterating her ongoing support for the LGBT community. The park has refunded the couple their money.
In reality, this is just a massive overreaction to a decision made by an employee who thought he (or she) was just doing the job assigned to them. If I’m going to a public amusement park, I wouldn’t wear a shirt that claims that Marriage is so gay, no sooner than I’d wear a shirt that asks, When do I get to vote on your marriage?
People go to these parks to enjoy themselves, not debate politics or religion.
According to its website, employees of Dollywood are trained to enforce a dress code to prevent patrons from being offended. Those guests with inappropriate tattoos, apparel or shirts with phrasing deemed questionable are asked to cover up before entering the park. The problem with that, of course, is what is offensive to one person is not necessarily offensive to another.
I would be offended if a shirt read that marriage is between one man and one woman. I’d also be offended if someone wore a shirt saying something derogatory about Jesus. An atheist may be offended by a t-shirt that quotes scripture of any kind.
It’s a muddy and confusing area to navigate.
Those of us in the LGBT community know that the phrase on the woman’s shirt is a show of support of same-sex marriages. But the same phrase could be read differently to mean that marriage is a shameful thing. Add to that the ongoing campaign featuring celebrities like Wanda Sykes arguing against making the word to be synonymous with stupid, and the blurry picture becomes even more pixelated.
Politically, we live in a historic time. New York recently became the sixth state in the country to legalize same-sex marriages, Don’t Ask Don’t Tell has finally been repealed, the Defense of Marriage Act is under fire, and a court decision on whether or not to overturn Proposition 8 in California is rapidly approaching.
We are making strides toward equality and this fuss over a t-shirt is a waste of time and energy that should be focused on the bigger picture. After reading an online report of the Dollywood incident I read readers’ comments below. The number of people using it as an example of LGBTs seeking special rights was numerous, yet not surprising. I was tempted to post that as a gay man, I’d never wear a shirt with a phrase like that to a theme park. There’s a time and a place to make political statements Dollywood is not one of those places.
I, like many of our readers, watched New York become the sixth state to legalize same-sex marriage and on July 25 the first day gays and lesbians could wed in the populous state I had my television tuned to various news channels to watch the joyous moment.
These are the things we should focus on, not on nit-picking items like a theme park questioning the wardrobe of a woman simply wanting to enjoy a popular vacation destination.
