Growing up in the Appalachian Mountains of Harlan County, Kentucky was not easy for many. My father, destined to be a coal miner and then a factory worker, lived his life as a character that mimicked the Klan, and was a notorious racist.
I remember him coming home from the factory where he worked and bragging about a “feud” where the white employees would fight the Black employees in the bathrooms while on the job. He truly believed that people of color and anyone who identified as queer were inferior to straight, white men and that they deserved to be treated as such. He was taught to hate anyone who was different from him, and this ignorance and hatred unfortunately seeped into our home.
My name is Martin “Leigh Shannon” Fugate, and I am now a business owner, politician, actor and a proud drag performer. It took me many years to become comfortable with who I am and to address the internal conflicts that came with being raised in a conservative Midwest town.
When I was 17, my father found an application for “Miss Gay Kentucky” in my bedroom, asked me point-blank if I was a “fucking queer.” Afraid to confirm his suspicions, I left home. For weeks, I was homeless and lost, not knowing where to turn or what to do. Eventually, I found my way to the stage. I had always been a singer in the church and I used that vocal talent to then become a drag performer. I donned wigs, makeup and flashy costumes, and I became someone new. I felt as though I could be someone who was free to be themselves, someone who wasn’t weighed down by the hate and bigotry of those surrounding them.
Even as I flourished on stage, I couldn’t shake the feelings of shame and guilt that came with being the son of a homophobic racist. Every time I performed, a part of me felt I was betraying my family, like I was turning my back on everything that my father had taught me was right and good in the world.
It wasn’t until years later, when my father was on his deathbed, that we finally had a chance to talk. He was able to offer up a half-hearted apology, stating that he was sorry for the way he had treated me and for many of the ways that he had treated everyone who was different from him. He told me that he loved me but, missing out on so much of life due to his hatred, this end-of-life attempt at fatherly love would never be enough to earn my forgiveness. Although I knew that his statement was not nearly enough to even begin to process years of pain and anguish at least this was a start.
It wasn’t until seven years ago that I then discovered I had a Black sister. A renowned psychic in our local Louisville area, a comforting voice called me one day out of the blue. I could tell from her southern drawl that she was a country girl, and I asked her, “Are you Black?” She laughed for a moment and confirmed my inquiry.
To my surprise, I learned that my racist father had a long-term affair with her mother — a Black woman who also worked in the cigarette factory alongside him. The woman had given birth to a daughter and had informed my father, who kept it a secret. Never acknowledging or financially helping his daughter as she grew up. When I finally met my sister, Vashti, in person, I could see the good parts of my father in her. A handsome man and country singer, he was charming and engaging. Vashti certainly had his looks and his charms. I knew that my father had missed out on something truly beautiful by not embracing his differences and the differences of those around him. What could have been if he had learned to love his gay drag queen son and Black daughter?
As we approach the middle of 2023, I fear that we are returning to the days of my father’s hate. Racism and hatred are becoming more prevalent. History seems doomed to repeat itself. I fear that we are losing the ability to truly love each other. Our family has already missed out on so much. Should we, as a society, be encouraging policies and procedures that further promote outdated, ignorant schools of thought? Should we be encouraging racism and homophobia; should we be banning books and hindering education? The answer is a resounding NO!
Gov. Ron DeSantis’ recent legislative proposals seek to erase Black history and the history of all those who have struggled to be seen and heard in this world. He seeks to demonize drag performers and the LGBTQ+ community, painting us all as groomers. He seeks to remove women’s reproductive rights. With these proposals we are moving backward.
I, for one, refuse to accept this. I refuse to give up hope. I refuse to let my father’s hate define my life and I refuse to let the hate of others define the future of our world. I know that love is still out there, waiting for us to find it and embrace it. I know that we can be better than this, that we can learn from our mistakes and move forward together.
I wish I loved my father more. I believe that if he were still alive, perhaps he could have learned to love us if he had more time. We seem to be losing the ability to love each other.
Let us remember the struggles of our past, let us honor the differences that make us all unique and special, and let us never forget the power of love to conquer all. We must not forget the lessons of the past or we are bound to repeat them. It is up to our youth to put an end to this senseless repetition of the past. Of course, the people of Florida continue to have a crucial say in the fate of our country’s progress. So many of us are sadly not voting. The only way we can move forward is to VOTE!
Martin “Leigh Shannon” Fugate is a local business owner, actor, comedian and entertainer best known for hosting the No. 1-rated female impersonation show and cabaret in Florida. He will soon be celebrating his 15th year at Hamburger Mary’s Orlando. A strong advocate for getting out the vote and creating political change, he is a past candidate for local political office and has a wide, diverse fan base. He’s been happily married to his husband, Joey, for 37 years.
