For the second time this year-already-the media has pounced on the touchy subject of whether it’s okay to out celebrities or politicians. These people are in the public eye, the argument goes, and therefore should expect to lose some of those rights to privacy. Especially if he or she is extremely anti- or pro-gay in their actions.
First, it was Rep. Aaron Schock (R-Ill.) who is a fitness model when he isn’t pushing anti-gay legislation in Illinois.
A blogger/journalist insisted the representative was a hypocrite because-he said-Schock is gay. His evidence: the man is handsome, muscular and athletic, photogenic and apparently follows an out Olympic Diver on Instagram.
It was a stupid argument to begin with and he had an even dumber example of “proof.” But he raised the question on where journalistic responsibility ends and invasion of privacy begins. Is sexuality newsworthy? Do we want it to be so?
Schock denied the allegation, again, talking heads discussed it to the point of exhaustion and opinions were expressed throughout social media on the appropriateness of outing someone.
Eventually the furor died down. But now we have an entirely different scenario eliciting the same question.
Queen Latifah, long rumored to be a lesbian, has never officially come out of the closet. She came close, some say, when she once told a large crowd at a gay Pride event that she was happy to be with “her people.” But the Cover Girl has yet to proclaim her same-sex attraction.
She has shared with the world numerous times that she supports marriage equality and LGBT rights. On Jan. 26, she officiated a mass wedding on the Grammy Awards, where a mix of 33 gay and straight couples legally tied the knot.
It was a historic television moment that, not surprisingly, pissed off far-right conservatives who were “disgusted” by the service. But I was shocked at the number of LGBTs and allies who were disappointed that Queen Latifah would participate in such a ceremony without coming out of the closet herself.
By simply supporting us, but not proclaiming to be one of us, many wished she hadn’t participated.
I understand wanting someone to come out of the closet and embrace who they truly are. I have yet to meet someone who has come out, however painful it was initially, and now regrets it. However, forcing someone out, or expressing disappointment when someone isn’t ready or may not even need to do so, isn’t fair.
Would you have wanted someone to pull you out before you were ready? I certainly wouldn’t have. In fact, that probably would have kept me in the closet longer.
The LGBT community constantly argues that our sexual orientation doesn’t make us any different than our straight neighbors and friends. Marriage is marriage, we argue, and gay rights are not “special rights” as those who oppose us like to shout.
If that truly is the case, why are we so fixated on outing others?
Queen Latifah, and Rep. Schock, for that matter, both have the right to live their lives as they see fit, whether they are staying true to their sexuality or not. The award-winning performer and the handsome right-wing darling can both fight for or against whichever causes they wish. Sexuality is not part of that.
Allies are an extremely important part of our mission to gain full equality. Should we dismiss the support Cher gives our community because she’s straight? Of course not. Would we want to exclude Ben Cohen, the handsome, retired European Rugby star who fights bullying because he’s not gay? No, we wouldn’t.
While many of us may wish those two celebrities were “family,” the fact that they aren’t doesn’t influence their passion for our fight.
I did not watch the Grammy’s live, but I saw the postings of it online the following day. It’s not the setting in which I would want to marry, but those couples have a right to do it their own way. now, they can say they were a part of history.
Rather than arguing about with whom each celebrity shares a bed, shouldn’t we stay focused on how their views affect our lives?
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